"I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the
shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhuser Gate.
All those moments will be lost, in time, like tears in rain."

Ulysses Everett McGill: What'd the devil give you for your soul, Tommy?
Tommy Johnson: Well, he taught me to play this here guitar real good.
Delmar O'Donnell: Oh son, for that you sold your everlasting soul?
Tommy Johnson: Well, I wasn't usin' it.

jsb223 and NoBSU were correct on mine.

Here are some more:

"I've never seen that. I've never seen anyone drive their garbage down the street and then bang the hell out of it with a stick...I-I've never seen that."

"What kind of a host invites you to his house for the weekend and dies on you?"

"Taj, I learned a long time ago that worrying is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere. Write that down."

"Will you take a pill or something? Will you just relax? Nothing's going to happen to us...we're juveniles!"

"True love is hard to find. Sometimes you think you have true love and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego, and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a ******* magic show ready to double team your girlfriend, and it stops..."

"It just so happens that your friend here is only MOSTLY dead."

El Mariachi said:

---

jsb223 and NoBSU were correct on mine.

Here are some more:

"I've never seen that. I've never seen anyone drive their garbage down the street and then bang the hell out of it with a stick...I-I've never seen that."

"What kind of a host invites you to his house for the weekend and dies on you?"

"Taj, I learned a long time ago that worrying is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere. Write that down."

"Will you take a pill or something? Will you just relax? Nothing's going to happen to us...we're juveniles!"

"True love is hard to find. Sometimes you think you have true love and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego, and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a ******* magic show ready to double team your girlfriend, and it stops..."

"It just so happens that your friend here is only MOSTLY dead."

---

"What kind of a host invites you to his house for the weekend and dies on you?"
Weekend at Bernies

"It just so happens that your friend here is only MOSTLY dead."
The Princess Bride

Oldbear83 said:

---

El Mariachi said:

---

jsb223 and NoBSU were correct on mine.

Here are some more:

"I've never seen that. I've never seen anyone drive their garbage down the street and then bang the hell out of it with a stick...I-I've never seen that."

"What kind of a host invites you to his house for the weekend and dies on you?"

"Taj, I learned a long time ago that worrying is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere. Write that down."

"Will you take a pill or something? Will you just relax? Nothing's going to happen to us...we're juveniles!"

"True love is hard to find. Sometimes you think you have true love and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego, and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a ******* magic show ready to double team your girlfriend, and it stops..."

"It just so happens that your friend here is only MOSTLY dead."

---

"What kind of a host invites you to his house for the weekend and dies on you?"
Weekend at Bernies

"It just so happens that your friend here is only MOSTLY dead."
The Princess Bride

---

"A man's got to know his limitations"

-Dirty Harry

No silly call me something nice.

What, like...boom, boom kitty f*ck?

nein51 said:

---

No silly call me something nice.

What, like...boom, boom kitty f*ck?

---

"I'm not even supposed to be here today!"

Hey who's watching these kids? The fat one is watching the little one!

Crash Davis said:

---

nein51 said:

---

No silly call me something nice.

What, like...boom, boom kitty f*ck?

---

---

I'm not gay but he lovvvvves the cock

"True love is hard to find. Sometimes you think you have true love and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego, and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a ******* magic show ready to double team your girlfriend, and it stops..."

Old School?
When Will Farrell comes home to surprise his wife Juliette Lewis?

Roy Rogers said:

---

Ulysses Everett McGill: What'd the devil give you for your soul, Tommy?
Tommy Johnson: Well, he taught me to play this here guitar real good.
Delmar O'Donnell: Oh son, for that you sold your everlasting soul?
Tommy Johnson: Well, I wasn't usin' it.

---

O Brother

NoBSU said:

---

"True love is hard to find. Sometimes you think you have true love and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego, and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a ******* magic show ready to double team your girlfriend, and it stops..."

Old School?
When Will Farrell comes home to surprise his wife Juliette Lewis?

---

Close. Luke Wilson, not Ferrell.

"A gun rack... a gun rack. I don't even own *a* gun, let alone many guns that would necessitate an entire rack. What am I gonna do with a gun rack?"

nein51 said:

---

Crash Davis said:

---

nein51 said:

---

No silly call me something nice.

What, like...boom, boom kitty f*ck?

---

---

I'm not gay but he lovvvvves the cock

---

Such an underrated movie. Also, it is hilarious that cock isn't censored given some of the stuff that is.

Crash Davis said:

---

NoBSU said:

---

"True love is hard to find. Sometimes you think you have true love and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego, and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a ******* magic show ready to double team your girlfriend, and it stops..."

Old School?
When Will Farrell comes home to surprise his wife Juliette Lewis?

---

Close. Luke Wilson, not Ferrell.

---

Right. Will was the streaker.

NoBSU said:

---

Crash Davis said:

---

NoBSU said:

---

"True love is hard to find. Sometimes you think you have true love and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego, and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a ******* magic show ready to double team your girlfriend, and it stops..."

Old School?
When Will Farrell comes home to surprise his wife Juliette Lewis?

---

Close. Luke Wilson, not Ferrell.

---

Right. Will was the streaker.

---

Snoop, snoop-a-loop! It's ok, bring your green hat.

I still can't believe no one has been a fan of the one I ;quoted earlier.

John Beckwith: Claire's mom just made me grab her hooters.
Jeremy Grey: Well snap out of it! What, a hot older women made you feel her cans? Stop crying like a little girl.
John Beckwith: I wasn't crying like a little girl.
Jeremy Grey: Why don't you try getting jacked off under the table in front of the whole damn family and have some real problems, jackass. Hey, what were they like anyway? They looked pretty good, are they real? Are they built for speed or comfort? What'd you do with them? Motorboat? You play the motorboat?
[makes sputtering motorboat noise]
Jeremy Grey: You motorboatin son of a *****! You old sailor you! Where is she? She still in the house?
John Beckwith: What's wrong with you?
Jeremy Grey: What do you mean "what's wrong with me?" What's wrong with you?
John Beckwith: No, what's wrong with you?
Jeremy Grey: No, what's wrong with you? You're projecting!
John Beckwith: Drop it.
Jeremy Grey: You drop it! You stop projecting on me! Why don't you go enjoy yourself while I go ice my balls and spit up blood.
John Beckwith: Drop it!
[starts walking away]

Here are some more
Jeremy Grey: Team player!

Sheriff, allow me to present a pair of fellow sophisticates. Turkey Creek Jack Johnson and Texas Jack Vermillion.

Roy Rogers said:

---

Sheriff, allow me to present a pair of fellow sophisticates. Turkey Creek Jack Johnson and Texas Jack Vermillion.

---

Don't get us started....

Crash Davis said:

---

nein51 said:

---

Crash Davis said:

---

nein51 said:

---

No silly call me something nice.

What, like...boom, boom kitty f*ck?

---

---

I'm not gay but he lovvvvves the cock

---

Such an underrated movie. Also, it is hilarious that cock isn't censored given some of the stuff that is.

---

It's greatness.

My wife often wonders how she married someone who loves those movies.

nein51 said:

---

Crash Davis said:

---

nein51 said:

---

Crash Davis said:

---

nein51 said:

---

No silly call me something nice.

What, like...boom, boom kitty f*ck?

---

---

I'm not gay but he lovvvvves the cock

---

Such an underrated movie. Also, it is hilarious that cock isn't censored given some of the stuff that is.

---

It's greatness.

My wife often wonders how she married someone who loves those movies.

---

I'm blessed, because Mrs. Crash Davis likes all of those stupid movies. Although I don't believe she has seen Jay and Silent Bob...that one might be stretching it ha.

Crash Davis said:

---

nein51 said:

---

Crash Davis said:

---

nein51 said:

---

Crash Davis said:

---

nein51 said:

---

No silly call me something nice.

What, like...boom, boom kitty f*ck?

---

---

I'm not gay but he lovvvvves the cock

---

Such an underrated movie. Also, it is hilarious that cock isn't censored given some of the stuff that is.

---

It's greatness.

My wife often wonders how she married someone who loves those movies.

---

I'm blessed, because Mrs. Crash Davis likes all of those stupid movies. Although I don't believe she has seen Jay and Silent Bob...that one might be stretching it ha.

---

Hey! That's my dead Ex girlfriends monkey!

Girls don't fart...only skivvy stoners fart.

It's chalk full of fantastic dialogue. I consider it an American classic.

nein51 said:

---

Crash Davis said:

---

nein51 said:

---

Crash Davis said:

---

nein51 said:

---

Crash Davis said:

---

nein51 said:

---

No silly call me something nice.

What, like...boom, boom kitty f*ck?

---

---

I'm not gay but he lovvvvves the cock

---

Such an underrated movie. Also, it is hilarious that cock isn't censored given some of the stuff that is.

---

It's greatness.

My wife often wonders how she married someone who loves those movies.

---

I'm blessed, because Mrs. Crash Davis likes all of those stupid movies. Although I don't believe she has seen Jay and Silent Bob...that one might be stretching it ha.

---

Hey! That's my dead Ex girlfriends monkey!

Girls don't fart...only skivvy stoners fart.

It's chalk full of fantastic dialogue. I consider it an American classic.

---

The scene with the banana cracks me up

GoldMind said:

---

The scene with the banana cracks me up

---

The one from Beverly Hills Cop?

nein51 said:

---

Crash Davis said:

---

nein51 said:

---

Crash Davis said:

---

nein51 said:

---

Crash Davis said:

---

nein51 said:

---

No silly call me something nice.

What, like...boom, boom kitty f*ck?

---

---

I'm not gay but he lovvvvves the cock

---

Such an underrated movie. Also, it is hilarious that cock isn't censored given some of the stuff that is.

---

It's greatness.

My wife often wonders how she married someone who loves those movies.

---

I'm blessed, because Mrs. Crash Davis likes all of those stupid movies. Although I don't believe she has seen Jay and Silent Bob...that one might be stretching it ha.

---

Hey! That's my dead Ex girlfriends monkey!

Girls don't fart...only skivvy stoners fart.

It's chalk full of fantastic dialogue. I consider it an American classic.

---

Regarding a "related" movie, I was partially in a conversation (ie not really paying attention) with my wife and one of her friends at dinner. The women were talking about a third lady (Joint friend not at dinner). My wife said, "Well, she is in an uncomfortable position." I replied, "what, you mean in the back of a volkswagon?" Both women stare at me blankly. The other husband laughs and says lets grab another beer in the kitchen.

NoBSU said:

---

nein51 said:

---

Crash Davis said:

---

nein51 said:

---

Crash Davis said:

---

nein51 said:

---

Crash Davis said:

---

nein51 said:

---

No silly call me something nice.

What, like...boom, boom kitty f*ck?

---

---

I'm not gay but he lovvvvves the cock

---

Such an underrated movie. Also, it is hilarious that cock isn't censored given some of the stuff that is.

---

It's greatness.

My wife often wonders how she married someone who loves those movies.

---

I'm blessed, because Mrs. Crash Davis likes all of those stupid movies. Although I don't believe she has seen Jay and Silent Bob...that one might be stretching it ha.

---

Hey! That's my dead Ex girlfriends monkey!

Girls don't fart...only skivvy stoners fart.

It's chalk full of fantastic dialogue. I consider it an American classic.

---

Regarding a "related" movie, I was partially in a conversation (ie not really paying attention) with my wife and one of her friends at dinner. The women were talking about a third lady (Joint friend not at dinner). My wife said, "Well, she is in an uncomfortable position." I replied, "what, you mean in the back of a volkswagon?" Both women stare at me blankly. The other husband laughs and says lets grab another beer in the kitchen.

---

I JUST used that line the other day. Underrated film.

Mitch: You know, um, something strange happened to me this morning...

Chris Knight: Was it a dream where you see yourself standing in sort of sun-god robes on a pyramid with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at you?

Mitch: No...

Chris Knight: Why am I the only one who has that dream?
-----------------------
Mitch: What are you doing?

Chris Knight: Self-realization. I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates, who said, "... I drank what?"

GolemII said:

---

Mitch: You know, um, something strange happened to me this morning...

Chris Knight: Was it a dream where you see yourself standing in sort of sun-god robes on a pyramid with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at you?

Mitch: No...

Chris Knight: Why am I the only one who has that dream?
-----------------------
Mitch: What are you doing?

Chris Knight: Self-realization. I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates, who said, "... I drank what?"

---

Real Genius. Another classic

Caddyshack - just about every line

"The characters and incidents portrayed and the names used are fictitious and any similarity to the names, characters, or history of any person is entirely accidental and unintentional. Signed RICHARD M. NIXON "

"If I had a nickel for every cigarette your mom smoked, I'd be dead."

"Wilson! Willllssssonnn?

I'm sorry, Wils . ..

Wils . . . . I'm S O R R Y!

W I L S O N . . . . . . . . .