Home Spun Wisdom: Add Your Best

2,636 Views | 27 Replies | Last: 4 yr ago by Pecos 45
Bearitto
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11:36a, 3/5/20
Here's where you put the sayings that really hit home with you. Sayings like:

- Worrying is like a rocking chair; it gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere.

- A timid salesman has skinny kids.
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Mr Tulip
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12:24p, 3/5/20
Turnovers are like ex-wives: accumulate enough of them, and it'll cost ya!
When in doubt, the Claymore is pointed toward you.
Do whatcha oughtta! Add acid to watta!
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drahthaar
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9:52a, 3/6/20
Some people's showing up is like two good people leaving.
I've been out scored on occasion and run out of time on some others, but I ain't never been beat!
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saabing bear
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11:35a, 3/6/20
Sometimes the only alternative to an absurdity is another absurdity.
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Stranger
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12:08p, 3/6/20
I don't know whether to kill myself or go bowling
I'm a Bearbacker
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No Longer Gold
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12:29p, 3/6/20
Don't think your IQ goes up along with your income, there is absolutely no correlation.
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BaylorGrad&Dad
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12:49p, 3/6/20
Never stand between a hoard of women and a shoe sale.
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Nguyen One Soon
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12:51p, 3/6/20
If you aren't the lead dog on the dog sled team, the view never changes.
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4th and Inches
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12:53p, 3/6/20
Drinking doesnt cause hangovers, stopping does!

A job 95 percent completed, is 100 percent incomplete.
Adopt-a-Bear 2024

#90 COOPER LANZ ( DL )
CLASS Junior
HT/WT 6' 3", 288 lbs


#50 KAIAN ROBERTS-DAY ( DL )
CLASS Sophomore
HT/WT 6' 3", 273 lbs
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Bearitto
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1:09p, 3/6/20
If it's worth fighting for, it's worth fighting dirty.

You ain't cheatin', you ain't tryin'
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Bearitto
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1:22p, 3/6/20
Never half a55 two things, whole a55 one thing. Ron Swanson

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Mr Tulip
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1:23p, 3/6/20
With sufficient thrust, pigs fly just fine. This is almost never a good thing.
It is generally impossible to make a baby in much less than nine months. You might slow the process down, but you'll never speed it up.
Cheap, fast, correct: you choose two.
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GoldMind
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1:34p, 3/6/20
"A lesson taught is better then one told"

"Pride cometh before a mighty fall"

"winners do what others wont"
Winning by cheating is just as impressive as winning fairly, probably even more so. Your opponent was better than you in every way, and you beat them with your brain.
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Bearitto
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1:44p, 3/6/20
There are only two things that will really get you in trouble...money and p*$$. Everything else can be sorted out.

Life is really just a sh*t sandwich. But the more bread you get, the less sh*t you eat.

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Gold Tron
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2:36p, 3/6/20
Don't ever mess with black cowboys.
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beardoc
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5:46p, 3/6/20
You can't climb a fence leaning toward you, or court a girl leaning away from you.
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drahthaar
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6:18p, 3/6/20
On women's dress these days, my father-in-law quoted his father-in-law:

"I can't tell if she's in gettin' out or out gettin' in."
"She ain't wearin' enough clothes to wad a shotgun."
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GoldMind
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7:43p, 3/6/20
"I'd rather be dead like a bump on a log than red on the head like the dick of a dog"
Winning by cheating is just as impressive as winning fairly, probably even more so. Your opponent was better than you in every way, and you beat them with your brain.
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GoldMind
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7:47p, 3/6/20
Old McDonald sittin ona bench
Beating his meat with a monkey wrench
Missed his meat and hit his balls
Now he's **** in his overalls
Winning by cheating is just as impressive as winning fairly, probably even more so. Your opponent was better than you in every way, and you beat them with your brain.
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SMack
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8:44p, 3/6/20
I'll fight a man with three children and a nice house any day over a man that's living out of a car.
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RD2WINAGNBEAR86
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8:05a, 3/7/20
Confucius say "Man who spend too much time in doghouse usually end up in cathouse."
"Never underestimate Joe's ability to **** things up!"

-- Barack Obama
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Stranger
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10:27a, 3/7/20
If you want to go to Heaven
You gotta D-I-E.
You gotta put on a coat and a T-I-E

If you want to catch a rabbit
In a L-O-G
You gotta make a commotion
Like a D-O-G
I'm a Bearbacker
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Stranger
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10:28a, 3/7/20
She don't know whether she's washing or hanging out
I'm a Bearbacker
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Malbec
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5:52p, 3/9/20
All a man needs to make something of himself is 10 hours of daylight and a King James Bible.
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ABC BEAR
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7:10p, 3/9/20
Overheard from a lady talking about food rationing while her husband was away in WWII: "I didn't mind the meatless days, but I couldn't stand the boneless nights."

When the frost is on the pumpkin, it's time for Peter Dunkin.

A friend in need is a friend indeed.

Confucius say: Man who pass gas in church must sit in his own pew.

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Nguyen One Soon
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In reply to ABC BEAR • 11:29p, 3/9/20
ABC BEAR said:

Confucius say: Man who pass gas in church must sit in his own pew.
Confucius say: Woman who fly upside down has nasty crackup.
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Bearitto
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In reply to Nguyen One Soon • 6:25a, 3/10/20
Nguyen One Soon said:
ABC BEAR said:

Confucius say: Man who pass gas in church must sit in his own pew.
Confucius say: Woman who fly upside down has nasty crackup.


Confucius say: Man who make mistake on elevator, wrong on many levels.

Confucius say: Man who have mosquito on testicles learn can solve problems without violence.

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Bearitto
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6:27a, 3/10/20
Confucius say: I only hear what I want to
I don't listen hard
I don't pay attention
To the distance
That you're running or to
Anyone anywhere
I don't understand if you really care
I'm only hearing negative, no no no, bad
So I, I turned the radio on,
Iturned the radio up
And this woman was singing my song
Lovers in love and the other's run away
Lover is crying 'cause the other won't stay
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Pecos 45
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10:32p, 3/10/20
A man who won't lie to a woman has absolutely no respect for her feelings.
“If you have a job without aggravations, you don’t have a job.”
Malcolm Forbes
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