Wangchung said:

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Oldbear83 said:

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Wangchung said:

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Seagulls will be going to hell. Every damned one of them. Edit; forgot to add ducks to that list. If you've been around ducks enough, you know. Evil little *******s.

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Ducks don't go to hell. They're pretty amazing, actually.

No teeth, no claws, smaller than most animals and yet if motivated they will attack as a group for common purpose.

Aside from their reckless bravery, the comedy value alone gets ducks into Paradise at the very least.

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Sorry, I've spent way too much time around ducks. They are violent. They gang rape, sometimes to the point of drowning the hen. The best thing about them is that they are delicious and, in many cases, beautiful.

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Odd, I have been around ducks most of my life yet never encountered what you describe.

Maybe you've been putting something in their feed?

Oldbear83 said:

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Wangchung said:

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Oldbear83 said:

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Wangchung said:

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Seagulls will be going to hell. Every damned one of them. Edit; forgot to add ducks to that list. If you've been around ducks enough, you know. Evil little *******s.

---

Ducks don't go to hell. They're pretty amazing, actually.

No teeth, no claws, smaller than most animals and yet if motivated they will attack as a group for common purpose.

Aside from their reckless bravery, the comedy value alone gets ducks into Paradise at the very least.

---

Sorry, I've spent way too much time around ducks. They are violent. They gang rape, sometimes to the point of drowning the hen. The best thing about them is that they are delicious and, in many cases, beautiful.

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Odd, I have been around ducks most of my life yet never encountered what you describe.

Maybe you've been putting something in their
feed?

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You weren't paying close enough attention. Or maybe domestic ducks around ponds are specifically evil.

4th and Inches said:

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47, you do realize that you included everyone on your list right? You could have just said everyone..

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Limited Atonement. Highly Limited.

Wangchung said:

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Oldbear83 said:

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Wangchung said:

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Oldbear83 said:

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Wangchung said:

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Seagulls will be going to hell. Every damned one of them. Edit; forgot to add ducks to that list. If you've been around ducks enough, you know. Evil little *******s.

---

Ducks don't go to hell. They're pretty amazing, actually.

No teeth, no claws, smaller than most animals and yet if motivated they will attack as a group for common purpose.

Aside from their reckless bravery, the comedy value alone gets ducks into Paradise at the very least.

---

Sorry, I've spent way too much time around ducks. They are violent. They gang rape, sometimes to the point of drowning the hen. The best thing about them is that they are delicious and, in many cases, beautiful.

---

Odd, I have been around ducks most of my life yet never encountered what you describe.

Maybe you've been putting something in their
feed?

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You weren't paying close enough attention. Or maybe domestic ducks around ponds are specifically evil.

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I pay a lot of attention. Maybe test your pond for fentanyl?

4th and Inches said:

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47, you do realize that you included everyone on your list right? You could have just said everyone..

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I did not write it I posted for the humor and I am poking a stick to the belly button of a few Pharisees here. Their heaven is a limited number. They are sure that they are on the heaven list but protective of some dogma about hell.

Oldbear83 said:

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Wangchung said:

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Oldbear83 said:

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Wangchung said:

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Oldbear83 said:

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Wangchung said:

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Seagulls will be going to hell. Every damned one of them. Edit; forgot to add ducks to that list. If you've been around ducks enough, you know. Evil little *******s.

---

Ducks don't go to hell. They're pretty amazing, actually.

No teeth, no claws, smaller than most animals and yet if motivated they will attack as a group for common purpose.

Aside from their reckless bravery, the comedy value alone gets ducks into Paradise at the very least.

---

Sorry, I've spent way too much time around ducks. They are violent. They gang rape, sometimes to the point of drowning the hen. The best thing about them is that they are delicious and, in many cases, beautiful.

---

Odd, I have been around ducks most of my life yet never encountered what you describe.

Maybe you've been putting something in their
feed?

---

You weren't paying close enough attention. Or maybe domestic ducks around ponds are specifically evil.

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I pay a lot of attention. Maybe test your pond for fentanyl?

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There WERE a lot of crackheads feeding ducks at that pond now that I think about it. Maybe those weren't breadcrumbs.

Wangchung said:

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Oldbear83 said:

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Wangchung said:

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Oldbear83 said:

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Wangchung said:

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Oldbear83 said:

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Wangchung said:

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Seagulls will be going to hell. Every damned one of them. Edit; forgot to add ducks to that list. If you've been around ducks enough, you know. Evil little *******s.

---

Ducks don't go to hell. They're pretty amazing, actually.

No teeth, no claws, smaller than most animals and yet if motivated they will attack as a group for common purpose.

Aside from their reckless bravery, the comedy value alone gets ducks into Paradise at the very least.

---

Sorry, I've spent way too much time around ducks. They are violent. They gang rape, sometimes to the point of drowning the hen. The best thing about them is that they are delicious and, in many cases, beautiful.

---

Odd, I have been around ducks most of my life yet never encountered what you describe.

Maybe you've been putting something in their
feed?

---

You weren't paying close enough attention. Or maybe domestic ducks around ponds are specifically evil.

---

I pay a lot of attention. Maybe test your pond for fentanyl?

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There WERE a lot of crackheads feeding ducks at that pond now that I think about it. Maybe those weren't breadcrumbs.

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Crips ... Bloods ... Quacks

Waco, what do you think Jesus meant by this statement?

"Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God's one and only Son."

Waco1947 said:

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4th and Inches said:

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47, you do realize that you included everyone on your list right? You could have just said everyone..

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I did not write it I posted for the humor and I am poking a stick to the belly button of a few Pharisees here. Their heaven is a limited number. They are sure that they are on the heaven list but protective of some dogma about hell.

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ah, my apologies.. carry on

Felt like I was in hell reading the OP.

"Oh no, the mean ol Christians have standards! Why won't God understand that walls don't work?!? Everyone is entitled to heaven regardless of their actions! Don't read the Bible, listen to a leftist if you want to know what it means to be a Christian!"

One cannot be a Christian and a universalist. They are incompatible.

Would you rather ...

Fight one horse-sized duck or 100 duck-sized horses?

Coke Bear said:

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Would you rather ...

Fight one horse-sized duck or 100 duck-sized horses?

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Now you've done it, here comes a Duckhorse attack!

4th and Inches said:

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47, you do realize that you included everyone on your list right? You could have just said everyone..

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We are all condemned. That's why we need a Savior, even Mother Teresa, even 47.

LIB,MR BEARS said:

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4th and Inches said:

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47, you do realize that you included everyone on your list right? You could have just said everyone..

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We are all condemned. That's why we need a Savior, even Mother Teresa, even 47.

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Very true, and a difficult truth for many of us to keep in mind.

100 duck sized horses. I think.

What about some Duckhorn?

nein51 said:

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100 duck sized horses. I think.

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I would agree.

nein51 said:

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One cannot be a Christian and a universalist. They are incompatible.

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You might enjoy reading the Evangelical Universalist by Gregory McDonald or The Inescapable Love of God by Tom Talbot for a more nuanced view. These are Christian Universalist positions that state Jesus is the only way but that all will eventually be saved.

You may disagree with their conclusions but may reconsider your statement that you "cannot be a Christian and a universalist."

This is not a position that all religions lead to God but rather that the saving act of Jesus leads to the ultimate salvation of all people (eventually).

"These are Christian Universalist positions that state Jesus is the only way but that all will eventually be saved."

Scripture is plain that this is not true. So unless you can demonstrate that Jesus and the Prophets before Him were misquoted or they lied, I will go with Scripture.

Mothra said:

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Waco, what do you think Jesus meant by this statement?

"Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God's one and only Son."

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Amen

Oldbear83 said:

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"These are Christian Universalist positions that state Jesus is the only way but that all will eventually be saved."

Scripture is plain that this is not true. So unless you can demonstrate that Jesus and the Prophets before Him were misquoted or they lied, I will go with Scripture.

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There is a third option. That we do not understand the plain meaning of the scripture. The pharisees were sure they understood the plain scripture. Jesus informed them that they did not. We are fallible which may mean our understanding is fallible.


Edited to say that Seagulls are from hell. I have knowledge of this daily.

Sorry, there are sixty-six books of Scripture for a reason. God told us over and over we have to make a choice. He said it as many ways as possible so there's no reasonable way to say 'I did not know'

We all have a choice. It's plain and it's clear.

Oldbear83 said:

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Sorry, there are sixty-six books of Scripture for a reason. God told us over and over we have to make a choice. He said it as many ways as possible so there's no reasonable way to say 'I did not know'

We all have a choice. It's plain and it's clear.

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Your faith (upon which you make that choice) is a gift from God! Enjoy it. Ephesians 2:8

Oldbear83 said:

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Sorry, there are sixty-six books of Scripture for a reason. God told us over and over we have to make a choice. He said it as many ways as possible so there's no reasonable way to say 'I did not know'

We all have a choice. It's plain and it's clear.

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73 books. Protestants removed the 7 deuterocanonical books.

Coke Bear said:

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Oldbear83 said:

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Sorry, there are sixty-six books of Scripture for a reason. God told us over and over we have to make a choice. He said it as many ways as possible so there's no reasonable way to say 'I did not know'

We all have a choice. It's plain and it's clear.

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73 books. Protestants removed the 7 deuterocanonical books.

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Ooh you love you some macabees?

Coke Bear said:

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Oldbear83 said:

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Sorry, there are sixty-six books of Scripture for a reason. God told us over and over we have to make a choice. He said it as many ways as possible so there's no reasonable way to say 'I did not know'

We all have a choice. It's plain and it's clear.

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73 books. Protestants removed the 7 deuterocanonical books.

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With good reason.

Oldbear83 said:

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With good reason.

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God would disagree. So would history. So would the Dead Sea Scrolls.

Mothra said:

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Waco, what do you think Jesus meant by this statement?

"Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God's one and only Son."

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Excellent question. Let me think

Coke Bear said:

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Oldbear83 said:

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With good reason.

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God would disagree. So would history. So would the Dead Sea Scrolls.

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I think you are presumptuous to say 'God would disagree', just because you disagree.

As for history, the Protestant Reformation had and has sound reason backing its arguments.

As for the DSS, one source only, hardly proves your claim.

Mothra said:

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Waco, what do you think Jesus meant by this statement?

"Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God's one and only Son."

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I think the answer lies in the next verses of John 3: 18 Anyone who believes in him is not judged. But anyone who does not believe is judged already. They have not believed in the name of God's one and only Son. 19 Here is the judgment. Light has come into the world, but people loved darkness instead of light. They loved darkness because what they did was evil. 20 Everyone who does evil deeds hates the light. They will not come into the light. They are afraid that what they do will be seen. 21 But anyone who lives by the truth comes into the light. They live by the truth with God's help. They come into the light so that it will be easy to see their good deeds."
The judgment is on those who in the darkness. The judgment is not a final end of life but an existential judgment. We live in darkness or light now.
"Anyone who lives by truth comes into the light." Again existential, we live the truth and that truth is Jesus himself. In his being and doing he is truth. Living in doing and being as Jesus brings into light. The walk out of darkness is not ours alone but God helps. It's all here and now and not then and there.

Oldbear83 said:

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I think you are presumptuous to say 'God would disagree', just because you disagree.

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Not just me. The entire magisterium and 1500 years of Christianity prior to Luther.

Oldbear83 said:

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As for history, the Protestant Reformation had and has sound reason backing its arguments.

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What did the Protestants reform? Nothing. They rebelled. Luther wanted to remove the Deuterocanonical books because they didn't fit with his theology. He also wanted to remove James, Hebrews, and Jude. Not exactly a model that I'd hang my hat on.

How does a group just decide to remove the word of God?

Oldbear83 said:

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As for the DSS, one source only, hardly proves your claim.

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The DSS is one of the greatest archeological finds in recent history. It clearly shows that the Essenes, writing in the Maccabees, used these books.

Just because they don't fit the Protestant narrative, doesn't mean that they should have been removed.

The Septuagint contained these books. IIRC, the Gospels quote from the Septuagint about 80% of the time.

Sadly, my Protestant brethren are missing out on great books, inspired by God. Read 2 Maccabees and Tobit. Amazing stories.

Coke Bear said:

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Oldbear83 said:

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I think you are presumptuous to say 'God would disagree', just because you disagree.

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Not just me. The entire magisterium and 1500 years of Christianity prior to Luther.

Oldbear83 said:

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As for history, the Protestant Reformation had and has sound reason backing its arguments.

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What did the Protestants reform? Nothing. They rebelled. Luther wanted to remove the Deuterocanonical books because they didn't fit with his theology. He also wanted to remove James, Hebrews, and Jude. Not exactly a model that I'd hang my hat on.

How does a group just decide to remove the word of God?

Oldbear83 said:

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As for the DSS, one source only, hardly proves your claim.

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The DSS is one of the greatest archeological finds in recent history. It clearly shows that the Essenes, writing in the Maccabees, used these books.

Just because they don't fit the Protestant narrative, doesn't mean that they should have been removed.

The Septuagint contained these books. IIRC, the Gospels quote from the Septuagint about 80% of the time.

Sadly, my Protestant brethren are missing out on great books, inspired by God. Read 2 Maccabees and Tobit. Amazing stories.

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good fiction is good fiction

Wangchung said:

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Seagulls will be going to hell. Every damned one of them. Edit; forgot to add ducks to that list. If you've been around ducks enough, you know. Evil little *******s.

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I sent quite a few ducks to hell. Especially the low flying ones. Oh yeah, pheasants too.