Foreign Exchange Student

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Married A Horn
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Have you ever hosted one? Which program did you use? Was it a pleasant experience and do you still keep in touch with your student?

We used EF Exchange 2 years ago to host an Italian girl. It was great and we still talk to her often.

Trying to host another next year but unsure which direction to go...nationality and gender.
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I've known a guy that was a host for EF for decades. I wouldn't go outside of their organization.

Clearly, you live near an an urban/suburban area where the students can experience quite a bit. If you don't, that's a major detractor. Think rural Kansas, Oklahoma, or all of Louisiana, haha. you'll find kids have a say and won't go to some places.

My work colleague in Berlin had been an exchange student in Wichita Falls. There was a cluster of Germans, they all did well, and it was a positive experience.

Are you trying to determine other countries from which you'd draw students? I'm happy to suggest.

Married A Horn
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I'm in Euless...like 2 blocks from the DFW airport. So yeah, its a good place for them. Urban area. 4 kids in the house. Big home. Funds to provide.

So we have a 15 14 and 10 year old boys now...daughter is a freshman in college. I want to get another girl to balance the house. Wife says its a bad idea because of teenage hormones.

As far as country: our top priority is having a student that will go to church with us. While some countries are more Christian minded, others seem to have a lot of kids that wont go to church at all. I was thinking Scandanavian this time around. We knew Italy and my wife's side shares a heritage background there. I love ancient history and Rome is in the center of that. So Italy was an easy choice. Anything else is more unknown to us.
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Married A Horn said:

I'm in Euless...like 2 blocks from the DFW airport. So yeah, its a good place for them. Urban area. 4 kids in the house. Big home. Funds to provide.

So we have a 15 14 and 10 year old boys now...daughter is a freshman in college. I want to get another girl to balance the house. Wife says its a bad idea because of teenage hormones.

As far as country: our top priority is having a student that will go to church with us. While some countries are more Christian minded, others seem to have a lot of kids that wont go to church at all. I was thinking Scandanavian this time around. We knew Italy and my wife's side shares a heritage background there. I love ancient history and Rome is in the center of that. So Italy was an easy choice. Anything else is more unknown to us.
1. your area is perfect. Lots of opportunities, good schools. It's easier to fit in at a big school.

2. Go network with Naomi Senz of Grapevine. They run an exchange program that is based on a sister city concept in Scotland. Get her opinion, she'll shoot you straight. I've hosted Scottish kids, but they seemed disappointed that my kids are from Europe, haha.

3. Your wife might be right., I think I'd err and take a boy, it would be intimidating for a girl.
4. Scandinavian will be worse for church attendance. There is a mood of stoicism that starts in Oslo and goes all the way to about Kiel. And Holland is probably out, too. I'd suggest Irish/Scottish, French or Spanish. At least the Catholic faith will introduce religion. But to your wife's experience, Italian would always be good. It would be difficult to distance myself if I had some luck with ANY country. Those four countries should be plenty. EF is legit about making the fit work.

As i'm sure you're well aware, they get really warped views of Americans. Your expectation is fine, there is a kid out there that thinks that's important.

I have hosted some Dutch kids too as part of a soccer exchange, but my connection there runs pretty deep so it wasn't really a stretch.
RegentCoverup
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it sounds like the church is important to you and that's good, it's way more i mportant to young people in Europe than the media will have you believe. You *might* also find Eastern European(Belorus, Ukraine, Estonia) that would be interested. in my experience, there are more Christians in Eastern Europe that can relate to our experience than in say...Scandinavia. Sort of because it's making a comeback from years of oppression.

But the countries I listed sort of have that 'official' stamp for religion and exposure for young people is higher. Willingness to participate in church attendance would absolutely be a bellwether on openness to all aspects of American culture.
Married A Horn
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Yeah the Italian girl was Catholic of course, but it wasnt a problem...went with us the entire time and we didnt pressure her on relgious stuff.

EF doesnt have Scotland or Ireland I dont believe.

Spain...probably should consider that. That is a great place to go visit him / her later. The Scandanavian students were the ones I was worried about church with - but some say they attend weekly and would go with us. So it may not be an issue even if most wont go at all.

As far as a girl coming in with 3 younger 'brothers' I cant see that being intimidating any more than just doing the exchange program to begin with. Our Italian girl got along with our boys better than our same age daughter.
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TellMeYouLoveMe said:

it sounds like the church is important to you and that's good, it's way more i mportant to young people in Europe than the media will have you believe. You *might* also find Eastern European(Belorus, Ukraine, Estonia) that would be interested. in my experience, there are more Christians in Eastern Europe that can relate to our experience than in say...Scandinavia. Sort of because it's making a comeback from years of oppression.

But the countries I listed sort of have that 'official' stamp for religion and exposure for young people is higher.


I'd consider eastern European - but again - EF has a very smalllist of countries and none of those are on it. The list is about 10 to 12 countries including Thailand and Japan.
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Married A Horn said:

Yeah the Italian girl was Catholic of course, but it wasnt a problem...went with us the entire time and we didnt pressure her on relgious stuff.

EF doesnt have Scotland or Ireland I dont believe.

Spain...probably should consider that. That is a great place to go visit him / her later. The Scandanavian students were the ones I was worried about church with - but some say they attend weekly and would go with us. So it may not be an issue even if most wont go at all.

As far as a girl coming in with 3 younger 'brothers' I cant see that being intimidating any more than just doing the exchange program to begin with. Our Italian girl got along with our boys better than our same age daughter.
1. Yeah, the only Scandinavian kids I've met that had a positive view of religion were from rural parts of Scandinavia. which is to say, it's very possible, just unlikely if they are from a major city. In fact, I'd say the primary motive for some kids in Europe to do an exchange tour is because of a sort of perceived awe of American wealth. In all other respects, there is a lot to like about Scandinavia. I'm very positive on Swedes. I'd err on the side of a kid from a more rural area simply because I think they'll like the difference. But back to the point about Scandinavia religion is that they will say they are open to it, while in the same breath criticizing it. Side story: I worked in Copenhagen.. Commuted to Malmo often. My colleague had been an exchange student in Houston. Super guy. Met a girl, they tried to live in Malmo, finally said enough and went back to Charlotte, NC. Super guy, just not someone I'd ever see in church. But point being, if they want to be there, they'll figure it out. He's dual Swede/US now.

2. Just leave it up to the girl. She might be leaving siblings, you never know. I'd trust EF's system and I'd take their suggestions prob no questions asked. Let's be real, you're experienced. That's huge.

3. But French/Spaniards will be exposed to religion and EF is strong in France. But damn can they be attached to their language..
RegentCoverup
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Married A Horn said:



I'd consider eastern European - but again - EF has a very smalllist of countries and none of those are on it. The list is about 10 to 12 countries including Thailand and Japan.
You make a valid point here and I've always wondered about this. EF sort of has to market in countries where American kids want to go first and THEN they reciprocate by taking kids from the same area to come to the US. Americans are actually much more open to hosting students than people realize.

Your area is probably as good as any in DFW for a kid to be an exchange student, that's just huge.
Obviously, you want a kid to be happy, but I think kids from Spain/France/Italy would be easily comfy.
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TellMeYouLoveMe said:

Married A Horn said:

Yeah the Italian girl was Catholic of course, but it wasnt a problem...went with us the entire time and we didnt pressure her on relgious stuff.

EF doesnt have Scotland or Ireland I dont believe.

Spain...probably should consider that. That is a great place to go visit him / her later. The Scandanavian students were the ones I was worried about church with - but some say they attend weekly and would go with us. So it may not be an issue even if most wont go at all.

As far as a girl coming in with 3 younger 'brothers' I cant see that being intimidating any more than just doing the exchange program to begin with. Our Italian girl got along with our boys better than our same age daughter.
1. Yeah, the only Scandinavian kids I've met that had a positive view of religion were from rural parts of Scandinavia. which is to say, it's very possible, just unlikely if they are from a major city. In fact, I'd say the primary motive for some kids in Europe to do an exchange tour is because of a sort of perceived awe of American wealth. In all other respects, there is a lot to like about Scandinavia. I'm very positive on Swedes. I'd err on the side of a kid from a more rural area simply because I think they'll like the difference. But back to the point about Scandinavia religion is that they will say they are open to it, while in the same breath criticizing it. Side story: I worked in Copenhagen.. Commuted to Malmo often. My colleague had been an exchange student in Houston. Super guy. Met a girl, they tried to live in Malmo, finally said enough and went back to Charlotte, NC. Super guy, just not someone I'd ever see in church. But point being, if they want to be there, they'll figure it out. He's dual Swede/US now.

2. Just leave it up to the girl. She might be leaving siblings, you never know. I'd trust EF's system and I'd take their suggestions prob no questions asked. Let's be real, you're experienced. That's huge.

3. But French/Spaniards will be exposed to religion and EF is strong in France. But damn can they be attached to their language..


Ok that point about them saying 1 thing while thinking another is quite helpful. So if we do go the Scandavian route we will try to look for a rural kid.
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If you can get past the cannibalism, children from Borneo are good additions to a community.
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Their matching system is probably better than match.com. The ONLY problem we had was with the girl's boyfriend back home not respecting our rules and being selfish and trying to get her to come back home early. We were not fond of him and he made her cry a lot. EF braced us for a lot more and taught us how to deal with many of those problems - but they never came up.

Sports wise - all 3 boys play soccer, but idk if I can go to any more soccer games than I already do. The 15 year old got selected to go train with Dortmund and man I feel its all we do.
Italian played volleyball and didnt have a great experience with the coach. So not that.
Open to the others.

Just using you as a sounding board on this part - not a critical part.
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Amal Shuq-Up said:

If you can get past the cannibalism, children from Borneo are good additions to a community.


Lol so helpful.
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Married A Horn said:





Ok that point about them saying 1 thing while thinking another is quite helpful. So if we do go the Scandavian route we will try to look for a rural kid.
You can afford to be picky. Because your area has a lot to offer. Transportation, good city. Nice suburb, kids from all over the US (and world). But you have the kid's interest as well. Curious how much EF would sort of put it to market if that makes sense.

I'd trust EF, every family I know that's ever participated has said they managed well.

Obviously, there will always be challenges, but they just seem to have it down.



RegentCoverup
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Married A Horn said:

Their matching system is probably better than match.com. The ONLY problem we had was with the girl's boyfriend back home not respecting our rules and being selfish and trying to get her to come back home early. We were not fond of him and he made her cry a lot. EF braced us for a lot more and taught us how to deal with many of those problems - but they never came up.

Sports wise - all 3 boys play soccer, but idk if I can go to any more soccer games than I already do. The 15 year old got selected to go train with Dortmund and man I feel its all we do.
Italian played volleyball and didnt have a great experience with the coach. So not that.
Open to the others.

Just using you as a sounding board on this part - not a critical part.
That's Italy. And Europe. Chauvinism is still alive and well. She was lucky to have a break and have you guys, no doubt. I'm sure she saw that. Good on you.

Covid has nixed it, but soccer exchange is a great way to do things as well. The world of soccer for women in Europe is just starting to open up, you *Might* press that with Scandinavian candidates. But yeah, I'd be whipped. But absolutely ask the soccer community, you might find some excelllent options. The Dallas Cup has been on hold, but I've met Gordon Jago(he was the tourney's founding guy) on a few occasions and that's a cinch for some people. Is a British girl an option? If so, ask Bobby Moffatt in Dallas or Challenger Sports(the british club that runs training stuff)

Totally appreciate you letting me offer comments. I have in-laws, cousins, uncles, aunts, etc. All living in Holland. They know they're free to stay and do so at will, but it's been eye opening how things shock them back into reality. I wouldn't over think too much, it's really a matter of attitude. If someone wants to make it work, they sort of will.

Married A Horn
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No British. I think EF wont do any English speaking nations ...I guess to force learning a 2nd language? They were big on only speaking English even if we knew Italian. I dont know that for sure, but either way Britain is not on their list. We would pick them no question if they were because we are most familiar with their ancient history and it is a top tourist destination for us.

Appreciate the comments. Keep em coming. More knowledge helps me be a better host.
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Btw, one of our neighbor kids did an exchange in Japan, like two years ago. He's come back a few times since, but for the most part has simply stayed in Japan. There were background factors, he wanted out. And weirdly enough, it is prob for the better. Suffice to say, EF is aware when the candidate leaves a less than stable home. So sometimes you might be doing these kids a favor...


The best people to ask are the people that completed exchanges and have had time to sort of reflect on it. The fellow I worked with in Malmo was a case study on the benefits. Want to say he want to UH? But clearly a guy that got a tremendous benefit.

RegentCoverup
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The economy in western Europe has absolutely sucked for the past two years, I gotta think young people are itching to get out and see the world.
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We make a lot for Euless. Not Southlake. But apparently compared to most of those European kids' families, we might as well be billionaires. It took our Italian awhile to get over a boring 3300 sq ft house.
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Married A Horn said:

We make a lot for Euless. Not Southlake. But apparently compared to most of those European kids' families, we might as well be billionaires. It took our Italian awhile to get over a boring 3300 sq ft house.
Yeah, it's hard for me to grasp, but their perception of wealth is distorted by our property sizes. It's particularly a European thing. And in Holland, EVERYTHING is cramped. They thought my SUV was like a monster truck, LOL. It's not like housing in Europe is cheaper per sq foot, but most people rent, rents are low and the spaces are friggin cramped. But they have more generous public spaces where they spend time, so home is truly just for eating and sleeping. And we usually have to have a sit down where we explain that bicycle transportation is both dangerous and unrealistic!

I'm kind of curious now if there are many Norwegians that want to host/leave for an exchange. With their sovereign wealth fund, many Norwegians have 2nd homes in warmer climates. And if I were a teenaged male, I'd be in Scandinavia in a heartbeat LOL
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TellMeYouLoveMe said:

Married A Horn said:

Yeah the Italian girl was Catholic of course, but it wasnt a problem...went with us the entire time and we didnt pressure her on relgious stuff.

EF doesnt have Scotland or Ireland I dont believe.

Spain...probably should consider that. That is a great place to go visit him / her later. The Scandanavian students were the ones I was worried about church with - but some say they attend weekly and would go with us. So it may not be an issue even if most wont go at all.

As far as a girl coming in with 3 younger 'brothers' I cant see that being intimidating any more than just doing the exchange program to begin with. Our Italian girl got along with our boys better than our same age daughter.
1. Yeah, the only Scandinavian kids I've met that had a positive view of religion were from rural parts of Scandinavia. which is to say, it's very possible, just unlikely if they are from a major city. In fact, I'd say the primary motive for some kids in Europe to do an exchange tour is because of a sort of perceived awe of American wealth. In all other respects, there is a lot to like about Scandinavia. I'm very positive on Swedes. I'd err on the side of a kid from a more rural area simply because I think they'll like the difference. But back to the point about Scandinavia religion is that they will say they are open to it, while in the same breath criticizing it. Side story: I worked in Copenhagen.. Commuted to Malmo often. My colleague had been an exchange student in Houston. Super guy. Met a girl, they tried to live in Malmo, finally said enough and went back to Charlotte, NC. Super guy, just not someone I'd ever see in church. But point being, if they want to be there, they'll figure it out. He's dual Swede/US now.

2. Just leave it up to the girl. She might be leaving siblings, you never know. I'd trust EF's system and I'd take their suggestions prob no questions asked. Let's be real, you're experienced. That's huge.

3. But French/Spaniards will be exposed to religion and EF is strong in France. But damn can they be attached to their language..
Looking at a 17 yr old girl from Boden, Sweden. She lives way out in the country but that is the nearest big city to her. Boden has about 17,000 people? Soccer, ping pong, guitar, choir, karaoke...all things we do.

Thoughts on Boden area culture?
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Married A Horn said:

I'm in Euless...like 2 blocks from the DFW airport. So yeah, its a good place for them. Urban area. 4 kids in the house. Big home. Funds to provide.

So we have a 15 14 and 10 year old boys now...daughter is a freshman in college. I want to get another girl to balance the house. Wife says its a bad idea because of teenage hormones.

As far as country: our top priority is having a student that will go to church with us. While some countries are more Christian minded, others seem to have a lot of kids that wont go to church at all. I was thinking Scandanavian this time around. We knew Italy and my wife's side shares a heritage background there. I love ancient history and Rome is in the center of that. So Italy was an easy choice. Anything else is more unknown to us.


That's a good community. I always wished Colleyville Heritage was like Trinity.
Married A Horn
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Why? Just move to Euless? Let Colleyville be Colleyville?
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Mitch Blood Green
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Married A Horn said:

Why? Just move to Euless? Let Colleyville be Colleyville?


After kid graduated, I left the community.
RegentCoverup
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Married A Horn said:

TellMeYouLoveMe said:

Married A Horn said:

Yeah the Italian girl was Catholic of course, but it wasnt a problem...went with us the entire time and we didnt pressure her on relgious stuff.

EF doesnt have Scotland or Ireland I dont believe.

Spain...probably should consider that. That is a great place to go visit him / her later. The Scandanavian students were the ones I was worried about church with - but some say they attend weekly and would go with us. So it may not be an issue even if most wont go at all.

As far as a girl coming in with 3 younger 'brothers' I cant see that being intimidating any more than just doing the exchange program to begin with. Our Italian girl got along with our boys better than our same age daughter.
1. Yeah, the only Scandinavian kids I've met that had a positive view of religion were from rural parts of Scandinavia. which is to say, it's very possible, just unlikely if they are from a major city. In fact, I'd say the primary motive for some kids in Europe to do an exchange tour is because of a sort of perceived awe of American wealth. In all other respects, there is a lot to like about Scandinavia. I'm very positive on Swedes. I'd err on the side of a kid from a more rural area simply because I think they'll like the difference. But back to the point about Scandinavia religion is that they will say they are open to it, while in the same breath criticizing it. Side story: I worked in Copenhagen.. Commuted to Malmo often. My colleague had been an exchange student in Houston. Super guy. Met a girl, they tried to live in Malmo, finally said enough and went back to Charlotte, NC. Super guy, just not someone I'd ever see in church. But point being, if they want to be there, they'll figure it out. He's dual Swede/US now.

2. Just leave it up to the girl. She might be leaving siblings, you never know. I'd trust EF's system and I'd take their suggestions prob no questions asked. Let's be real, you're experienced. That's huge.

3. But French/Spaniards will be exposed to religion and EF is strong in France. But damn can they be attached to their language..
Looking at a 17 yr old girl from Boden, Sweden. She lives way out in the country but that is the nearest big city to her. Boden has about 17,000 people? Soccer, ping pong, guitar, choir, karaoke...all things we do.

Thoughts on Boden area culture?
That's fantastically remote. Yeah, so that's what I mean about what a good candidate would look like. Boden is on the way to virtually nothing. So even at 17k people, it only gets loggers and other work traffic. It's beautiful. But it's essentially a truck stop on the arctic circle. And yeah, it's cold as f.

Like I said, because of your location, you have a lot to offer. So in the two-way street of this, she'd be getting a great deal because of just everything that's going on. My gut feeling is always that the kid is ambitious and wants more than their current environment offers. Compared to Boden, you look like midtown Manhattan!

When a kid is from a town that small and that far off the map, the main thing i would ask is simply about her attitude towards living in the US in a big city. Is she open to trying new things, exploring, etc? If that's the case, it's a no brainer. There is no real preparation for this kind of cultural jump, you either want to do it or not.

I think it would be really interesting for both parties.

Married A Horn
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She said she has hardly left her house in the past 2 years cause of covid.

And she has a reindeer farm...lol. Wow.
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Make sure you finagle a deal to get some knives!

https://fallkniven.se/en/home/

Yeah, these are the kids that really benefit. There is no short trip out of Boden. You pretty much have to go south for a loooooong way and it doesn't appear they have a rail line...
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I need some good steak and kitchen knives...do they have those?
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Yeah I am thinking this girl is about to enter an alternative universe. Janurary in Northern Sweden to August in Texas - lol.

Told the EF matching staffer that I hope the girl doesnt melt!
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Married A Horn said:

I need some good steak and kitchen knives...do they have those?
Yes, or at least they should. I'd just ask. What happens is these 'knife manufacturers' are sitting on areas where there is a mine where they can easily extract quality metals. I'm sure that's the case here. I used to work near Solingen in Germany. Solingen has been producing knives, swords, armor since the Middle Ages. You can buy all kinds of knives and cutlery in Solingen for a fraction of the price you'd find in a U.S. retail shop. I bought two small suitcases of Solingen cutlery and knives and brought them home to the US. But point being is, the quality of the metal involved is really the most important factor in the long haul.

https://germanysolingen.com/en/3-knives

Their brand I'm sure is just as good(maybe better), it's all a game of marketing. Get what you can, I'm sure the metal quality is legit!

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Married A Horn said:

Yeah I am thinking this girl is about to enter an alternative universe. Janurary in Northern Sweden to August in Texas - lol.

Told the EF matching staffer that I hope the girl doesnt melt!
Yeah, and they frequently go topless EVERYWHERE once it goes above 80 degrees. North of Amsterdam, air conditioning is unheard of, so that heat will be an ass-kicker the first time.

They will jump in water of ANY temperature, LOL.
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Lol - this 17 year old girl better NOT be going topless at my house! She wont see below 80 degrees for 3 or 4 months.
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Swedes are generally modest, but in truth, it's really a northern European thing in general.

The whole concept of open toed footwear is really only for the bathroom, haha.
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I'm about to have a hot tub installed... I'm starting to reconsider. lol
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They like saunas, too. But they are picky about quality,

I already know what the answer would be in my house if I even tried this, but I think you e come this far you e gotta do it!
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