* * Fun With Dick and Jane

26,309 Views | 522 Replies | Last: 11 hrs ago by Assassin
Dia del DougO
How long do you want to ignore this user?

sicem365 may be rethinking their merger with baylorfans.
Roy Rogers
How long do you want to ignore this user?
My math teacher called me average. How mean!
"Sic em yesterday, sic em today, sic em forever"
Gold Tron
How long do you want to ignore this user?
My dyslexic daughter always says that when life gives you a lemon, make melon-ade.

She came up with that on her own...
Assassin
How long do you want to ignore this user?
What kind of magic do cows believe in?

MOODOO!!
Roy Rogers
How long do you want to ignore this user?
No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
"Sic em yesterday, sic em today, sic em forever"
Assassin
How long do you want to ignore this user?
A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight, live longer than the men who mention it...
Assassin
How long do you want to ignore this user?
My gal is leaving me because I'm going bald.

I'm not bothered, it's hair loss.
Assassin
How long do you want to ignore this user?
Why did the vegan cross the road?

To tell someone he was a vegan.
Assassin
How long do you want to ignore this user?
I've been diagnosed with a chronic fear of giants.

Feefiphobia.
Malbec
How long do you want to ignore this user?
If you choked Papa Smurf, what color would he turn?
syme
How long do you want to ignore this user?
Son: "Dad, why is my sister's name Rose?"

Dad: "because your mom loves roses."

Son: "Thanks, dad"

Dad: "You're welcome, BJ"
Assassin
How long do you want to ignore this user?
syme said:

Son: "Dad, why is my sister's name Rose?"

Dad: "because your mom loves roses."

Son: "Thanks, dad"

Dad: "You're welcome, BJ"

Come again?
Assassin
How long do you want to ignore this user?
The dirty look you give the asphalt after you trip and faceplant...
Assassin
How long do you want to ignore this user?
After all these years, I'm finally ready to confess...


I let the dogs out!
syme
How long do you want to ignore this user?
The son was named after what the dad loves.
Roy Rogers
How long do you want to ignore this user?
There's safety in Numbers, but I prefer Deuteronomy.
"Sic em yesterday, sic em today, sic em forever"
Assassin
How long do you want to ignore this user?
syme said:

The son was named after what the dad loves.
Assassin
How long do you want to ignore this user?
The 3 things I'm grateful for:

1. Family
2. Friends
3. Caller ID to avoid family and friends.
Assassin
How long do you want to ignore this user?
What do the movies "The Sixth Sense" and "Titanic" have in common?

Icy dead people.
Roy Rogers
How long do you want to ignore this user?
What's the difference between a guitar and a fish? You can't tuna fish!
"Sic em yesterday, sic em today, sic em forever"
Assassin
How long do you want to ignore this user?
To the person who hid my shoes while I was on the bouncy castle - Grow up!
Assassin
How long do you want to ignore this user?
Sometimes I use really big words which I don't understand to make me seem more photosynthesis.
Assassin
How long do you want to ignore this user?
A duck was about to cross the road when a chicken came running & said, "No don't do it!, you'll never hear the friggin end of it!"
Assassin
How long do you want to ignore this user?
I was dating this dominatrix, then one night I told her it's time to hit the sack.
Assassin
How long do you want to ignore this user?
After dealing with DirectTV billing this AM, I wonder how long I'd be on hold if my call wasn't important to them...
Assassin
How long do you want to ignore this user?
Cooking Tip: If you're tired of always having to boil water every-time you make pasta, boil a few gallons at the beginning of the week and freeze it for later.

You're welcome!
Assassin
How long do you want to ignore this user?
Quote:

Two Aggies are walking down the street. The first one, who is carrying a bag of doughnuts, says to the other, "If you can guess how many doughnuts are in my bag you can have both of them."
Assassin
How long do you want to ignore this user?
I can't believe I forgot to go to the gym again today - that's like seven years in a row.
Assassin
How long do you want to ignore this user?
I'm not fat, I'm just half a foot short...
Assassin
How long do you want to ignore this user?
This guy was killed with a Starter's pistol today.

Police think it's race-related...
Roy Rogers
How long do you want to ignore this user?
I couldn't quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually, it came back to me.
"Sic em yesterday, sic em today, sic em forever"
Franko
How long do you want to ignore this user?
Have your ears listen to this right now:
https://youtu.be/ARWT471RSp0
Franko
How long do you want to ignore this user?
Have your ears listen to this right now:
https://youtu.be/ARWT471RSp0
Franko
How long do you want to ignore this user?
Have your ears listen to this right now:
https://youtu.be/ARWT471RSp0
Franko
How long do you want to ignore this user?
I do not have a vast collection of jokes, one-liners etc. But I have a strange fascination with the funny and odd things that can be found on the internet. I have collected some of this stuff over the years. So Assassin, if you don't mind, I thought this would be an appropriate place to share some of this stuff.

Would you go to either of these urologists?
http://somerseturology.co.uk/doctor/mr-burns-cox/
https://www.urologyteam.com/our-doctors/dr-richard-chopp
Have your ears listen to this right now:
https://youtu.be/ARWT471RSp0
 
×
subscribe Verify your student status
See Subscription Benefits
Trial only available to users who have never subscribed or participated in a previous trial.